There was a mindfulness seminar at work today. I think I failed it.
Basically you should be paying attention to things happening now. A different way would be to say, don’t put your brain on autopilot. Although when I say that out loud, it seems like a route to tiring yourself out. Decisions are draining, and if you are paying attention, you are also deciding; not directly but I can see it happening.
In any case, you should not be distracted by things.
I spent most of the class distracted.
At one point the presenter was talking about marathon runners. Something about how they stress themselves to be able take on more stress. The presenter was aware of my proclivities and so even mentioned me directly. His theory may have some basis, but I feel it is less stress and more pain. Long distance runners put ourselves through pain so that we don’t feel pain as much. We make terrible patients for doctors because when they ask us if something hurts, it generally doesn’t, even though we have broken bones that would cause normal people to be catatonic.
I trade pain for less stress.
That was why I was distracted in the class about not being distracted. The person two chairs to my left decided that he wanted to stretch his arm out on the backrest of the chair between us. This felt like a needless invasion of my personal space and started to stress me. However, I did have a solution; when he had removed his arm temporarily, I put mine on the backrest. It wasn’t comfortable, but the defence of my personal space made my stress go away.
After awhile, I gave him the benefit of the doubt, and took my arm away. Within five minutes he had stretched out again. So at the next opportunity, I placed my arm back there and left it there for the rest of the class. It hurt, but I was no longer stressed. Although it was awkward when they asked us to start writing things down.
It was a suitable arrangement in my head. Pain for peace.
I do have a two day class in two weeks that should totally cover this subject. But I have also been reading the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Bleep: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life. Hopefully I can improve myself to actually be mindful and not just give it lip service.