Ha ha! I successfully snuck a tube of toothpaste through security. I feel so evil. The catalyst of my life of crime is a lack of trust in Air Canada.

The last time I flew to Jamaica, one of my suitcases decided to stay in Toronto and enjoy the sights. That suitcase had all my toiletries. So, this time, I tried to have the bare necessities in my carry-on. That meant toothpaste.

Actually, my biggest fear was my new iPod. I purchased it via the Apple store, which let me laser engrave it for free. Not having anything better to do, I put the name of the two web addresses I own on it. One of them is www.airwreck.org. If you were paranoid, that would be a terrorist threat, but really, say it out loud and it’s my name.

I left home too early. I forgot that my planned departure time already had a half hour padded on to it in case of emergency. So my leaving early “just in case” was not one of my better ideas.

Of course I get better peace of mind, at the expense of waiting around for even longer.

My new pen refused to let any ink out. I’m using the backup pen. I hope this isn’t an ill omen.