Today was laid back.

In the morning I wandered and took pictures of people. I watched Jonathan give some bullwhip lessons.

Jean, an artist, invited me to lie with her on the beach. That was pleasant. While doing that, there was a scavenger hunt announced. Participation in it was low, so I was able to score three bottles of rum. I gave one to Jean.

I joined her for lunch too. For the record, she has a boyfriend. So nothing is going to happen, but she is a very nice person from Minnesota.

She’s in a fashion show tonight. I’m not going to be in it, but I’ve volunteered to help. I’ll be in the back, lacing nubile young women into corsets.

I’m surprised there weren’t more volunteers.

Scuba diving tomorrow.

Last night did not go well. The snoring guy sounded like a bullhorn was strapped to his face. He’s also a member of the polar bear club, so he likes it cold and has set the air conditioner to 17 degrees. I don’t actually recall sleeping. I think I must have because I’ve been fairly cognizant most of today.

I talked to the organizer and he said he would look into it, but it doesn’t look good for tonight.

I might try a hammock outside.

Sleepy now. Snoring guy is quieter. I’m tired. We’re good to go.

There is irony going around.

Although I have all my luggage, empirical evidence shows I didn’t pack toothpaste. I have a small travel bottle that I think is over ten years old. I don’t think it did much good.

And I forgot to go to the store to get more until ten minutes after it closed.

Also, I met my roommate for five seconds as he was switched out on me for a guy named Anthony. He’s fat and he snores.

Great.

Not really. No.

In other news, I’ve decided no more alcohol. I’m finding that a few hours after having a drink I get really depressed. It goes away, but I guess it’s my version of a hangover.

Needless to say, I got very depressed.

Hoorah!

I had to leave the party because of a clothing malfunction. That’s upsetting, but my missing suitcase was outside the door.

The first order of business: I have shaved.

Oh, and I have a roommate. At least I have his stuff in my room. He could be anyone.

Good news. My luggage is in the country. I should have it tonight via Air Canada delivery.

Today was a low key day. I tried to sleep in, but that’s hard to do in an unfamiliar place. I had breakfast with Jonathan and his mate Vahni. Nice couple. They seem to have made a summer project to find me a girl. I’m not disagreeing with them.

Basically I talked with the incoming people and relaxed. Renewed old acquaintances as it were. I didn’t do anything exciting.

That’s for tonight.

Still no roommate.

It’s hot and sweaty here. I’m still wearing the same clothes as yesterday. I need to take a shower then change for a cocktail party. I think I’ll try a vodka slushie.

I arrived at the resort and tried to get my room. It was about 7:00 and I was tired and cranky. On the bus was a guy who wouldn’t shut up and had the most annoying Texan twang. Another guy, a local, kept trying to sell me marijuana. And when that failed, he tried cocaine and harder drugs. My mood didn’t especially improve when the key provided didn’t open the door to my room.

Eventually it was sorted out and I got myself some dinner. Not great fare, but it filled a void.

I looked around for people I knew. Since this was an annual event I was expecting to see a familiar face, but I couldn’t find anyone.

And it was still raining.

Eventually I did spot Marc from Belgium. Finally someone I recognized. He introduced me to Holly and Al. As a group, they had decided to go back to the nude pool. I said I would join them later.

Before that I talked to a nice girl, Lisa, who seemed to be the resorts masseuse. She offered to give me one later, but first I wanted to contact Air Canada to see about my luggage. (Bad prioritizing there, but I wanted to stop worrying.)

My luggage is still in Toronto. The Air Canada person claims they have a 97% success rate in getting luggage to destinations within 24 hours. Here’s hoping. I only have the contact lenses I’m wearing, and they’re daily-wears. If I take them out, they don’t go back in.

Hopefully I’ll have a suitcase tomorrow.

I went back to Lisa, and she started describing the massage options. As she went along, they started getting out of the traditional massages they teach at accredited institutions. Maybe she’s just very friendly and likes me? Then she mentions prices for services rendered. Abort! Abort! Abort!

I joined the others in the nude pool.

When it rains in Jamaica, it really rains.

I’m officially in Jamaica, but it still hasn’t sunk in. Mainly because the stress level is still too high.

For example, if you want high stress, watch the baggage carousal shut down while you are still missing a suitcase. That’s my current situation.

I think it was because the plane was so full, extra baggage has been delayed until tomorrow. I’m really hoping it comes then because I’m missing all my toiletries.

And it is raining.

I need a vacation.

The inflight movie for this leg was The Island. It was good. I do wonder if Steve Buscemi is fated to die in every movie he’s in.

For the past week I’ve been fighting a cold. I’m pumping myself full of vitamins and trying to get sleep. The latter hasn’t really been working out. I think I’ve gotten an hour’s sleep since I woke up yesterday morning, and that hour was a fake sleep.

I’m hoping I can keep this sickness as minimal as possible. You can’t go scuba diving with congestion. And sniffling doesn’t make a good impression with unattached women. But it’s only a feeling of phlegm in the back of the throat. So I think it isn’t obvious.

It’s been going up and down for awhile. I found a can of coke in a high altitude plane seemed to leave me in the best state.

Wow. PST. I haven’t had that in awhile. Alberta has spoiled me.

I’m having breakfast in the Toronto airport, enjoying a “Toasted Western”. Maybe “enjoying” is too strong a verb. “Tolerating”. But I need food. From observation Air Canada doesn’t feed people anymore unless they pay extra.

Cheapskates. One bankruptcy protection and all the perks go out the window.

The natives here are enthralled by the lights of the television broadcasting a hockey game. I shall avoid eye contact. They might sense that I do not support the “home team” and become aggressive.

I didn’t sleep much on the flight. Well, not at all, but I did pretend for awhile. The rest of the time was spent watching Must Love Dogs. A predictable romantic comedy.

I should have slept.

I’m at the Edmonton airport now. I got everything together and I hope I’m not missing anything. I could have used an extra watch though.

I bought my current watch over a year ago, and in theory, it is water resistant to 100 meters. But last spring condensation formed inside it after I was walking in the rain. It eventually went away so I couldn’t justify sending it back to Timex for repairs, but the problem flares up every so often.

Since I’m planning on testing its water resistance by scuba diving, I would have liked to have a spare. But I couldn’t find my old one, so here we are.

Security was dead, but there were about eight officials waiting around. So my backpack got their full attention. I think a trainee was involved.

I’m glad I didn’t bring my computer. Part of me would have liked to so I could keep a better journal by typing instead of abusing my horrid skill at cursive writing. I could also load camera pictures directly. But this is a vacation. No computers.

So I’m about to head off to Jamaica. I have a friend picking me up in fifteen minutes. Right now I’m just nervous if I’m forgetting anything.

I’m proud of myself.
This morning I got up at 7:30 and went off for a run. So I had about four and a half hours of sleep. I don’t think I could have gotten up at that hour if there hadn’t been a time switch.
Good weather for running, and a nice brunch afterwards too.
I did find that for most of the day I have been somewhat zoned out. After the brunch I stopped at a friend’s place where they were working on a long board game. I watched for longer than I had planned. It became easier to watch them play then get along with my own life.
The television has also been very seductive.

Well I didn’t win the costume contest this time. Darth Vader won. He had a glowing sword. I can’t compete with that.
The club was a lot more crowded tonight. A little too crowded because with the wings it became very hard to maneuver. I tended to stay in a small pocket of calm near the fooz ball table. For some reason it was usually empty around there and that let me stand around without fear of whacking someone in the head. I even got to be the fourth in some fooz ball games. (Note to self: I suck at fooz ball.)
So I lost the contest to some schmuck in a Darth Vader costume. However, there were a number of benefits to this. A lot of girls would come up to me and say that I had deserved to win. And a fair number of them were cute. I’m a sucker for attention.
Unfortunately I think I talked to the owner, or the manager, or someone in charge and mentioned losing to the guy with the glowing stick. I’m not sure who it was, but she loved my costume, and later on in the evening I was handed an envelope with a consolation prize. That’s generous. It wasn’t until I got home and opened the envelope that I found that my bad behavior of whining was rewarded with $100 bill.
With the crowds, came the weird people. In the first few hours of the night there was a girl who loved my costume. Possibly a little too much. She was running her hands through my “hair” and feeling all over me. I was even awkwardly dragged onto the crowded dance floor for some very close dancing. Then she said she would be right back. And that’s the last I ever saw of her.
Weird, but not the weirdest.
At around 2:15 (daylight savings time) another girl also said she loved my costume. Specifically, “You can dance with me anytime.” And she was very nice to dance with, although it was more rubbing than anything else. So far this doesn’t sound bad, but there is one caveat. The entire time, in her left hand, she had a shirtless guy on a chain leash.
Even on the dance floor.
I can only describe it as surreal. A more honorable person would have left her alone since she obviously had another man in her life.
I’m weak.

There are a lot of benefits to having an awesome costume for Halloween.
I got my act together and got a great demon costume made for myself. It had good wings and an interesting headdress to go with it. It was just finished today, so I took it out to the bar I usually go to. I’m usually not there on a Friday because of other engagements. Most times I go on Saturdays. But I was told last week that they are having Halloween celebrations all weekend. So might as well get maximum usefulness out of this.
And the costume was proven good, because I won the prize for best male costume. The reward wasn’t that great, but still a free $50. So that is one benefit. Tomorrow there is a much bigger prize, (I should know, I won it last year) but the competition will be stiffer because all the people who were in the Halloween Howler (a big party at the convention center) tonight will show up then.
The other benefit is that all night women were coming up to admire me/it. And when they start feeling you up, they really can’t complain when you do the same to them. And this is the day when they are most likely to be scantily clad in some costume that would be illegal on any other day.
And the third and final benefit? They either take pictures of you or let you take pictures of them. And then we exchange emails to send them to each other.
I like this plan!

Well the new haircut is popular. I’ve had a lot of compliments on it. Being a guy I wouldn’t normally get those, but it was a drastic change for me. Usually I have slightly longer hair, and this time I have it cut quite short. I’m thinking I should have it short for my vacation. It’s in less than two weeks now, so I’m getting nervous/excited. I hope I’ll have everything ready.
Part of getting ready is going to a tanning salon to get a base tan. I started at ten minutes every couple of days. Now I’m up to fourteen minutes per session and it is sooo boring. If I could fall asleep or listen to CBC AM it would be better. But it isn’t long enough for unconsciousness to claim me, and the radio doesn’t get AM.

I binged this weekend.
Yesterday I purchased season 2 of Arrested Development. I finished watching all 18 episodes a few hours ago. That sounds pretty pathetic, but I’m also surprised at how much else I got done this weekend.
I played games with friends of Friday, then went out looking for a good karaoke bar (unsuccessful). On Saturday I got my hair cut, had breakfast with a friend, went out to the bar in the evening. Today I did a 19km jog, had brunch, saw a play and went to an improv jam.
I’m actually surprised I found time to see all those episodes in less than two days.
Mind you, my condo is currently a pig sty, so sacrifices were made.

I did the run today. Which was good since I had skipped the long distance run on Sunday. A lack of sleep and a slight drizzle had made the prospect of sleeping in more appealing than running 29km, which I don’t think I could do with my injury anyway.
After today’s run I got distracted by television. (It glows so beautifully.) At around 9:00 I remembered that I had to go to the Edmonton Journal office to drop off my weekly Sudoku entry. I usually go by scooter because it is more fun that way. As a lark I checked the weather office’s radar imagery before leaving. It was quite a shock to see a huge body of blue heading right into Edmonton. That was my cue to rush.
Last year I had a bad experience with weather while on my scooter. The inclement weather in Canada of the year hit me while I was scootering home through the river valley. That was not pleasant.
I could try and exaggerate and make the trip more exciting, but there was nothing to report. I rushed around to get there, probably unsafely, but no disaster. On the way there I felt a very slight drizzle. It didn’t increase, and was barely noticeable. The entire trip took twenty minutes.

I went to the Prospect Jam as part of my improv class.
Basically it was a chance to practice improv without all the nasty feeling that I should be learning. That’s what the classes on Tuesday are for.
The classes have been great for that, and theory is all fine and good but I do need to put all the information into practice. And apparently that is what the Prospect Jam is for. Several people who may or may not be performing in Theatresports get together and do some improvising. Mind you, all of them are actor people so their attention span is minimal at best.
I saw and performed in some hilarious scenes. And in the end, isn’t that all that is important.

I’m a bad person.
A month ago there was a monster Sudoku in the newspaper with a draw prize for whomever solved it. As previously reported, on September 11th, after solving it I experimented and attempted to write a computer program that could also solve it. It was an interesting intellectual problem.
Two weeks ago there was another monster Sudoku, with a slightly higher difficulty. This time, instead of gas, the prize was a flat screen TV by a brand I’ve never heard of. I was weak, and instead of earning the solution, I plugged it into the program. It didn’t completely solve it. I needed to program a simple trick into it and then it could handle it. In my defense, I manually went through the puzzle with the program to confirm every digit position it gave me.
Of course, I had the solution, and there was a prize involved. So I entered it into the draw.
While I was in Priddis last weekend I cancelled my newspaper for the duration. To my surprise, when I came home I saw a pile of newspapers before my front door. I’ve complained to the Edmonton Journal, but still, I got free newspapers.
And then there was another monster Sudoku in the Sunday one. Great! My descent into hell continues. This time the prize is Safeway gift certificates. And the puzzle was an even higher difficulty rating. My program required another tweak to use actual intelligence to solve the puzzle.
Previously the tricks used to find the solution were brain dead. It didn’t look too deeply at the puzzle. This time, there was a need for actual thought. The trick I programmed in was not an obvious one. So now I feel like I am really cheating. I should be doing the human thought process for that part, but I wimped out and used the power of technology to abuse the system.
It still didn’t stop me from dropping off the solved puzzle at the newspaper.

I’m in my parent’s house southwest of Calgary now. It’s been a nice Thanksgiving trip.
On the first day I helped them unload a large moving van. It didn’t have much furniture but it did have non-essentials that needed moving. The real stuff will come later. After that it was back to chopping down trees.
Today was more interesting.
This morning my mother and I drove into the Kananaskis region. It’s a large park in the mountains. The plan was that I would go running and my mother would bike to keep up. Harry the dog would hopefully get tired out. At the information booth I asked if there were any trails that were good for running. No, they only had hiking trails. I did find one they said was reasonably flat that was close by. The Riverside trail.
I enjoyed the route. It was rocky so I had to keep my eyes down whenever I was moving. It started above the Elbow river, but soon it went down and I was running along the banks. Then it started climbing and climbing. It was okay for me. As a runner, I enjoy the challenge of a good hill. But my mother couldn’t keep up and needed help with the bike.
But since I had to stop and let her catch her breath I saw some spectacular views. I wish I had brought a camera.
After about 4km the trail ended on the highway. My mother couldn’t handle going back on the trail again so we went along the road back to the trailhead. Harry was tied to a leash because with a speed limit of 100kph, it wasn’t a good idea to have him wander into traffic.
In this area of the park, there were cows. Apparently ranchers can pay rent and let their cattle graze in the area. So as I ran back, the cows placidly watched me go by, as cows are wont to do. Mooo. A young bull, pre-horn stage, found us more interesting and decided to start chasing Harry. Remember, said dog was attached to me by a leash.
Luckily its heart wasn’t in the chase. We were faster than it, and it dropped away soon enough. Something like that does perk up your run though.

If you have home… er, condo delivery of the newspaper, there is a daily routine you go through. (At least I do.) You get up, go to the front door, get the newspaper and read it over breakfast.
Note that I never actually said that part of that process was “getting dressed”.
It adds a little excitement to the morning ritual to open the door, baring pretty much everything to the world, and hope that no one is wandering past your door. Be quick about it, and don’t lean to far out because you might notice that there was someone at the far end of the hall.
If I was more on the ball, I would check through the spyhole in the front door before risking the wrath of any decency squad. But the morning is when one is the epitome of lazy.
Last weekend there was that moment of danger. I open the door, hear someone coming down the hall, and quickly close it again. I’m sure I am not fooling the guy walking past. He probably knows exactly what is going on. Why else would someone open the door and then immediately shut it.
I bring this up, because this morning, while I was leaving my condo, the door across the hall, with a newspaper in front of it, briefly opened and then quickly shut.
What could I do, but say “Good morning” and walk down the hallway.
Don’t look back.

Like a junkie finally getting that hit of crack he needs so much, you can tell that the Canadians are getting their fix again.
Hockey is back.
It’s the little signs that give it away. The fact that a morning meeting is delayed by a few minutes as people discuss last night’s game. I wander into the lunch room and people, getting coffee, are debating how the new rules are affecting the game.
Most of all, me being accused of being a bad Canadian because I still don’t watch it.

One last thing.
I saw Serenity last night.
Good movie! I would recommend it to a friend.

And they did something I’ve wanted to see in a continuing series for a long time.

For the past few weeks I’ve been lax in updating this journal. Mostly it has been because I haven’t been doing much that is interesting. Now that something interesting has happened, I’ve just been too lazy to write about it. I guess it’s that old adage that you have to keep writing, otherwise you stop. Or it’s something like that.
Anyway, yesterday there was a social committee event at our company. This time around we were having a poker match. Texas hold ’em.
I hate gambling. I’m not good at it, and it is usually me just handing over any money I came to gamble with. However, this was just with poker chips. They had an assigned value of $350,000 for every player. But that was just imaginary. There was a prize at the end, but not worth getting worked up over.
Since it wasn’t my money (or anyone’s) I enjoyed the game. The first hand was a big loser because the guy to my left was raising everything, and I, being inexperienced, just went along for the ride. Neither of us won that hand so one guy had a large stack of chips in front of him. Later on I won another big hand, and I think I was in second place at my table.
My moment of triumph was when my two cards were both clubs. The cards that had been put down and shared among the players had three clubs. So I had a straight. I was going to win big this time. I started raising. Unfortunately, the guy to my left did too. If I had been a more experienced gambler I would have had some concern. He had a straight too, and his king beat my ten. After that loss, I just went all in with my next hand, even though I had nothing. I didn’t see me advancing from my pool anyway.
After that, I played a board game with a person whose religion didn’t allow gambling. I had more fun with that.
Even though I lost.

Yesterday, a bunch of us went to Pho Hoa for lunch. It’s in West Edmonton Mall, just outside (literally) from the T&T Supermarket. Last time we went there I didn’t care for it. It was very soup-centric, and I felt a little too hydrated afterwards.
This time though I ordered something non-soup and enjoyed it quite a bit more. Continuing the trend that long distance running has given me, I ate quickly and I was finished first. It gave me time to look at the four colorful pictures that were hanging on the wall.
As near as I could see, they were telling a story.
1) The boy, who was a fisherman, was deeply in love with his cow. He played with her often.
2) The girl with the bicycle saw this and was jealous.
3) So while the boy was off fishing…
4) She started making moves on the cow.

Maybe I shouldn’t look at art anymore…